I am now in Wales, about to start my “hostile environments” training course before I head off to Kabul on the 10th.  I’ve spent the last 3 days in London getting to know the BBC Afghan team, seeing friends, and combatting a cold.  I’ve posted a video update. It’s been quite a mental rollercoaster.  One day I am feeling upbeat, looking forward to my trip, the next day I am thinking of all the awful violent images I see on the news, imagining myself in the center of such things.  I was seriously questioning myself, my decision, and my impulse to continually and adamantly unveil hope and goodness from those settings and places our society has placed at the bottom of the heap.  My fear was strong, my strength wavered.